...isms

Indifference is a powerful aphrodisiac.

The person who loves the least has all the control in every relationship.

Thinking about men while you fuck a women doesn't make you bisexual any more than fucking a melons makes you a vegetarian. You're a meat-eating vegetarian.

If you burn enough bridges you will live on a island.

A relationship should enrich you, not complete you.

If you are looking for your other half, they will be with an incomplete person. Only two complete people make a relationship.

If I gave a shit I'd give it to you.

I'm not a size queen but I've been impressed.

Dating when you're lonely is like grocery shopping when your hungry.

Christ ate meat; Hitler was a vegetarian.

I'm a practicing homosexual. When I get it down I'll let you know.

When in doubt the answer is always no.

Being with someone just because their cute is like trying to live on desserts.

fundMENTALists

It's time to start passenger profiling! Put all fundaMENTALists on the no-fly list. The answer is obvious. We know who and we know where. Let's see.... a "man", with no luggage, buys a one-way ticket with a goat. The only airline he should have been able to get a seat on should have been Air Yemen. I hear they have cabin fireworks instead of an inflight movie. Rather, on ALL international flights, the TSA bans inflight movies, shuts off all power to seats, no overhead reading lights. You can't piss in the toilet or have anything in your hands for the last hour of the flight. As Churchill said. You can count on Americans to do the right thing after they've exhausted every other possibility. And just so you know.... there is no religious reason or significance for Islamic women to cover their heads. It has nothing to do with a respect or allegiance to God. It isn't in the Koran. The "only" reason Muslim women have to be covered is because Muslim men can't show sexual self-restraint! If you live in a free society, the wind should be blowing through your hair! Burkas and head scarves are the ultimate symbol of female possession, supression and repression. Even some Muslim countries forbid them from being worn on college campus'.

Trans-itioning

Americans

I am truly embarrassed and afraid of the lower Mason-Dixon line Americans; those under-educated, over-religious, poor working-class, currently unemployed and uninsured, who voted for the George W. Republicans that created this mess. Frightening is their view of Sarah Palin as America's political madonna. The woman that, while riding a snow mobile, birthed Bristol, the poster child of unsafe sex. Didn't anyone think to tell this child what every gay man knows, that anal is a 100% effective means of birth control. Guys named Levi love it! This extremism is no different than fundamentalists we are trying to defend ourselves against in Afghanistan. I think the Dixie Chicks have been validated and vindicated.

Our strength is our unity. Other opinions are not allowed. - Oskar Shmitz (1913) - Repbulican

"Balls!" said the queen, "If I'd had them I'd be king."

Free To A Good Home - boyfriend

I’m giving my boyfriend away, free, to a good home. Boyfriend is housebroke (which means he can never pay the rent) and hung. Amazingly hung, which is such a waste considering he’s an unbelievably, selfish, unrelenting, uncompromising, non-versatile bottom! It is, however, visual compensation for the bad head he gives, sometimes confusing my penis for a chew-toy. If he ever goes down in a plane crash, no need for dental records. Just match the teeth to the marks on my dick. When posting an ad. on CL (which he thinks I don’t know about) he’s not just a bottom, he’s an ‘insatiable bottom’ which he has misspelled. And, if you ask him the definition of insatiable he will reply, “It’s something you lick.”

It’s unlikely that you’ll find him wasting time thinking, using his imagination or reading. He does, however, possess an amazing ability to text message at an astounding rate with his opposable thumbs on a microscopic, numeric keypad. His dedication to honesty should be noted. Technically speaking, he’s never lied to me; he just avoids the truth. As he puts it, “The truth takes too fuckin’ long!” I think he may be a superhero because he kums faster than a speeding bullet, can leap over tall piles of dirty laundry in a single bound and can see through all his friends. He’ll tell you he’s a freshman at the university majoring in pharmacology. Actually, he’s a THIRD year freshman with an unhealthy preoccupation with drugs.

I’ve tried unsuccessfully to teach him about the concept called respect. But, unfortunately, I’m no Annie Sullivan with an unlimited amount of patience, willing to stand at a water pump signing R-E-S-P-E-C-T into Keller’s cheating little hand. He’ll admit he has commitment and self-esteem issues but is quick to add that it’s not entirely his fault. Evidently, when he was born, his mother announced to his father, “I don’t care what it is! I’m raising it as a girl!” And, whenever the family was out in public and ran into acquaintances, his father would would put his hand on top of Keller's head and say, “Yup, we have three, one of each.”

I’d like to keep him but I’ve finally realized the problem with our relationship, WE'RE BOTH IN LOVE WITH HIM and hate me. So he’s yours, free of charge, to a good home. All you have to do is drive by and pick him up. But, as soon as he gets in he’s gonna want food and a bowl.

iQueery = Intelligent Queer

The intelligent queer is insightful, educated, unsettling, opinionated, humorous and just beyond borderline obnoxious. He can be repetitive until he's sure his point is clear, contentious and cynical. But, if you can look beyond, you can see that his cynicism can be quite amusing. The intelligent queer has an orientation but it doesn't develop into an identity. The intelligent queer comprehends his orientation but realizes that it defies simple or traditional definition. The intelligent queer is culturally mainstream and gender ambivilent in regard to making social connections. The intelligent queer doesn't limit their social connections to only the gender that can sexually amuse him. The intelligent queer is guided by interest, not preference. The intelligent queer realizes that even if he had sex every day for an hour, sex would only be 1/24th of his life. Bowel movements can take longer. The intelligent queer doesn't dismiss the relevance of either. The intelligent queer equates indifference as "not caring" and at the same time realizes it's effectiveness as a emotional weapon and aphrodisiac. The intelligent queer celebrates and takes pride in his accomplishments and not in his orientation. Orientation is not an accomplishment. It is merely a state of being. The intelligent queer enjoys and creates controversy. The intelligent queer does not identify with the term "gay". It implies a sub-culture and thus denigrating itself to a sub-species. The intelligent queer is merely "not straight". The intelligent queer has no desire to identified with the HRC and regards it as an elitist organization, Junior League for gays. The intelligent queer doesn't want to be "=". The intelligent queer reaches be beyond mediocre and strives to be ">". I am an intelligent queer.